The Shibby Sheet

Hiya! And welcome to another week of the world of the Shibby one, well this week the Shibby Sheet is brought to you by, not an object! Just a thought in my head after some disturbing news that has been going round where I live, lets say that a Large Burger selling place that we shall say has a big M in its logo (wont give the name away), which is near where I work has just sacked 6 people for Spitting in the burgers! Mmmm!!! Lovely, so for the past 8 weeks, the Shibby Sheet has been brought to you by a guy that eats spit filled burgers!!

But do not worry my Shibby faithful, I have already contacted Lex Luger and have offered him a big contract to work at this disgusting place to bring law and order to it, and bitch slap the dirty filthy swine’s into making decent non phlegm burgers! Also hopefully keeping the muscled gimp away form the WWE at the same time, so we are all winners in this one!!

Ewww, last time I eat a beef burger though from a fast food chain, dirty sods, think ill buy a Hamburger tomorrow instead.

Anyway, enough of the wacky area of where I live, onto the Wrestling World and what I have thought of it this week.

Jim Ross :

Well on Raw last week we saw a funny turn of events as the cuddly JR blew his fuse and quit Raw, but then Lord Eric Bischoff said Noooo!! YOUR FIRED! Anyway, all in all the walking mash mellow man is off our TV screens for a while leaving us with Jerry the perv Lawler and Jonathan Knob Head.

Now, after the past few months, it has to be said the Raw commentary team has been getting pretty dire fast, cuddly Jimbo was constantly going on about Austin during other peoples matches, while Jerry the perv was just making no sense along side and going into perv over drive when ever a woman came near the ring, hey nothing against a nice women, but Jerry can over do it, and he seems to do it pretty much all the time now

Haven’t seen Raw this week yet, but I’m dreading the two man commentary of Lawler and “The Coach”, all it will be is “PUPPIES!!! Oooo! Coach I’m getting all hot and hard here and it’s not the weather!” and of cause from Coach all it will be is “Alrightttttt!!! PEACE!! Oh MAN!!! Yeah!! HA HA!! YO! MAN!! ALRIGHT!!! PEACE!” Pff, Christ, dunno what’s worse the man that thinks he is still 18 or the wannabe Barry White.

Even though Jimbo Jumbo Ross isn’t as good as he once was, I hope he comes back soon! Or bring in some one else!!! William Regal, Joey Styles, Don Callis or even Jesus him self Paul Heyman! He must be the greatest commentator ever!

Anyway, I still enjoy Raw! How couldn’t I, Nash is back with his long flowing hair! Goldust is running about for all his proud golden fanny’s, The APA will soon return, it’s just great, but it’s like looking at a divine painting by Claude Monet or Paul Cézanne while having the music of Right Said Fred or Gary Glitter in the back instead of Robert Palmer or Iron Maiden.

It just won’t do.

Goldberg & Kevin Nash :

For the past two weeks on raw, two big names of the wrestling world returned or in Mr. Bergs case debuted on WWE TV! Goldberg debuted with possibly the worst spear ever, which probably made Rhyno spill his coffee and drop his hob nobs then break out in hysterics while watching at home, while the 2^nd week Kevin Nash returned and was much better with his Usual Jacknife and snake eyes to Mr. Jericho, oh and of cause with new 2003 brown edition hair, divine it was.

Who will make the biggest impact? Well, after seeing a clip of Goldberg this week spearing Christian ill admit it was a pretty sweet spear, much better than his 1^st one, and also a nice Jack Hammer, erm, he has 2 moves, NICE!

Kevin Nash has probably 7 – 8 moves which is ok, but he is Mr. Cool! He’s the guy you wish was your dad, (Nowt wrong with my dad though! He’s shibby) I mean, who has a dad who is 7ft tall and the best hair in the world, and you could also justifiably (posh word) say. “My dads bigger than yours” Oh yes! Big Daddy Cool is shibby!

Well, both guys are not the most talented ever, even they know that, but they both have something that quite a few on the WWE don’t have at the moment! Charisma and “IT”, I said IT by the way not the knowledge in using computers.

New guys on the roster or ones who are getting big pushes like Batista, Test, A-Train, Nathan Jones, they just haven’t got IT!!! Ok A-Train has a nice hairy back but they haven’t got that thing that makes the causal wrestling fan go “Oooo, think ill just watch this a bit more before I turn over to watch the 10 minute free view on the porno channel”, Nash & Goldberg both have that.

So even though Nash & Goldberg “Apparently” have backstage power and stuff, they are both essential to the WWE, should they be WWE Champion? Hmmm, dunno, cant be much worse than HHH at them moment so who knows, but both mean are needed to get the WWE out of its current slump to help it back up again, then pass the so called torch thing over to the new breed like Rhyno, Orton, Lesnar, Cena etc.

You need the old guys just as much as the new, as people don’t like CHANGE! Imagine watching Eastenders with out all those old farts in it, have no idea who they are as I don’t watch it, but you know what I mean.

Jeff Hardy :

Here is a bit of an Interesting article I just read on Jeff Hardy, as you know he has been away from Raw, and also is one of my most favorite wrestlers! So here we go:

                          ---------------------------------------------------

Jeff Hardy has heard the rumors.

He has no passion for wrestling... he's in trouble with the WWE bigwigs... the list of woes goes on.

”Its frustrating for the high flying 25 year old, a WWE star who has had enough obstacles in his life to worry about a string of rumors.”

"Its really aggravates me" he said. "I've seen things like I have chronic fatigue syndrome and I have an eating disorder. That's the power of the internet for you. I can’t really do anything about it."

It's not only criticism of himself that bothers him but numerous general observations.

"I hate it when people criticize matches" he said. "Someone will say 'oh, yeah, he didn’t sell that move enough.' They have no idea what it's like to be in the ring. It's pure ignorance."”

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Well, there you go!, certainly an interesting read, are we all a lil bit to picky on wrestlers nowadays and in particular Jeff Hardy?

Ive never really been one to go “Oh dear, he did that move wrong, he’s rubbish” and go posting on forums and stuff, people make mistakes, its part of life! I’m sure someone will say “Well he gets paid million’s to do his job, he shouldn’t cock up” Pfff no matter how much people get paid or whatever people cock up, I cock up at work sometimes and I’m sure that you my fellow reader cock up (must stop saying cock its rude) on occasion also.

Has Jeff Hardy lost his interest in wrestling? Who knows only one person can answer that and it’s Jeff Hardy, not me and no one else.

One thing is for sure is that Jeff Hardy has had some of the greatest matches in the history of the WWE/F the matches with RVD, the TLC matches, the Ladder match at No Mercy, I could go on, he certainly has been one of the biggest names in the history of WWE if he wasn’t, we wouldn’t keep talking about him.

Anyway, as a big fan of Jeff I look forward to his quick return to raw, erm, though maybe minus the war paint, but hey, I guess Sting did it as well, and his painting certainly is quite good! Quite like Monet with a touch of Picasso, anyway, see you soon Jeff! Hmmm, Unlikely like he reads this though! Bless.

EASTER!

Off topic here, but you know its Easter right, well ive got some lovely kinder eggs here! Mmmm, tasty but I remember as a kid that the lil toys where great! And you had a lil instruction booklet to make your flying bee with wheels, or push back banana, it was great! But erm, they seem to have lost there imagination now! All ive got is a cruddy plastic computer which face changes and some little plastic boat!

WHERES THE PASSION IN YOUR JOB KINDER EGG MAKERS!!!! DAMN YOU!!! DAMN YOU!!!! Sigh, use to like these things, pff cheap crap! And now they cost more! 60p dammit!!! Pff, the kids must wonder what all the fuss is about, I guess the Kinder Era has passed us, oh well.

10 Shibby Titbits of the week :

1. Kevin Nash : He’s got a bit more larger since he left has he not? Also nice fireworks!
2. Big Show : He feel on his arse!!! Ha ha, that was funny, but Rey Vs Show! Hmmmm, who booked that!
3. Jazz : She has hairy armpits.
4. Goldberg : Doesn’t he sound very mellow! He could be the next Marti Pellow.
5. Paul “Jesus” Heyman : WHERE IS HE!!! Wrestling is not the same dammit!
6. Brock Lesnar : Is he a buffed up Homer Simpson? “I landed on my noggin!” Pfff! He’s turned into a big girl! Still he made me laugh.
7. Eric Bischoff : While Paul “Jesus” Heyman is the reincarnation of the son of God, Bischoff is the Son that god never had, so ill call him Gordon, he is Special!
8. Jericho : Will he be a good guy soon? I do miss a good guy Jericho!
9. Jericho’s Beard : ITS GONE!!! Noooo! Just as I was getting used to it and gave it a pet name! he shaved it off! Oh I called it Ralf by the way.
10. Undertaker : Gone again for injury! Is it the beginning of the end of one of the all time greats? :( I hope not.

Well that’s this weeks shibby sheet over and done with for another week, and bless you all for reading it! Hmm, dunno why I keep saying bless as I’m not religious! Oh well, one of those things I guess.

Hope you all had lots of choccie eggs and feel incredibly ill! Mmmm, I do like chocolate and I also like eggs! So Easter Eggs are a god send! I wonder if they make Chocolate boobs of Torrie Wilson, Hmmm, ill pop over to WWE Shopzone now and let you know on my findings next week!

Stay Shibby

This site is NOT affiliated with the WWE, ECW, XWF, XPW, The Pope or any wrestling Fed, Ta very muchley!.